John Isaac,skip, after being on the wrong end of a 10-3 beating. "At times like this, I used to take refuge in blaming my skip"
After our lamentable defeat against Chirnside in the Border League where Paul was playing with an eyesight problem due to a scratched cornea, Jim Keddie was heard to say " I think the whole Duns team must have had scratched corneas, as they all played as if they had eyesight problems"
Anna-May: 'I dont enjoy this playing 3rd as you have got to pay attention to what is going on'
Helen , after the game, to Colin Martin 'I've lost my gripper sole, can you check whether Colin J has lifted it accidentally and taken it into the men's changing room ?' Colin checked -negative. When he came out Jill reported that Helen had found the sole -- it was on her foot!!!! (a la John Walker and the £20).
Overheard John Isaac, after a horrendous game in the Border League, 'That's the worst I have ever played in my life' Colin J in reply, 'Oh no John. I disagree,--------- you played even worse last Friday' There is nothing like a friend to kick you when you are down and CJ is nothing like a friend.
Jill: ' There has not been so much on the overheard column because I've been keeping my mouth shut'
Jill ' There was much more nonsense going on upstairs' Paul 'But you are downstairs now, Jill'
Colin ' With out a word of a lie, I heard Jill was going to paint George's toenails ( which were sticking out of his plaster cast) blue ' Chris ' I've got little stars you could stick on his toes Jill' Jill : ' This is all lies' Jill : ' Shut up Colin, remember we stuffed you last time ' Colin to Paul : 'I see Jill is back on form in the overheard dept '
After a severe pounding in the Duns Bonspiel (only marginally worse than that suffered by Paul's rink) Colin Jeffries was first up in the queue for the buffet. Heard from the back of the queue -rather unkindly "Is that the first time you've been in front today Colin?"
Liz reprimanding Gus after a particularly fierce piece of sweeping ' You should not be gasping for breath, you are out of condition, Colin is looking much fitter' Gus wailed in reply 'I've just finished a 40 hour working week, what's he done ?' CJ 'You are dog tired; I am re-tired'
Instruction from Liz to lead Jean Bryans on her 2nd delivery after Jean had fallen heavily on her first delivery "Same as your last"
After the game on Thursday, John Walker came up to the bar with his flies undone. 'You have egg on your chin, John ' said Gus. John dutifully wiped his chin. 'XYZ' said Colin J. John looked blank. 'Examine your zip' said CJ 'Your flies are undone' said someone from the crowd. 'Oh, I am always doing that' said John 'you see the zip is in the wrong place' ' Round the back is it' said CJ
Jill asked Colin M in the brush cupboard what this skins thing was all about. Colin "helpfully" advised that first you had to strip down to your skin. Jill wasn't buying this!!!
I have forgotten the context of the conversation we were having with Jill about skins but she announced to all present that "perhaps she just wasn't getting enough" - maybe she should take Colin's advice after all.
George Whiteford has been unfortunate in that he has only had three players turn up for several league games for a variety of reasons. This has lead to witty barbs by some that the no-shows are because George is skipping (we are a cruel lot at times). At the start of this years pairs George was delayed in traffic and turned up 10 minutes late. Overheard on the day was the comment - "You see, he doesn't even want to play for himself!". Sorry George it is all meant in good fun.
I am pleased to announce that the sense of humour in the club hasn't changed. Having requested that I be kept informed of match results so that I can keep the site up to date I was relieved to see that I should get off to a good start as the first match had Colin Jeffries playing against Colin Martin with John Walker in attendance also. I felt sure that one of these worthies would email me the result hot off the ice. Any regular visitor to the site will know that all of these parties can usually be relied upon for some input. It was therefor with some regret and a bit of annoyance that I received no word and so I undertook to contact the gentlemen concerned and request the relevant information about the game. I received one email in return stating quite simply --------------------- "Colin Won".
Well at least it wasn't a draw!!!
Keith Prentice discovered that our own dear Helen had her own gardening business and temptingly asked "So are you the Duns version of Charlie Dimmock?" - Helens response "No I wear a bra...........but I don't wear any knickers!" Well now you know chaps, if you need your grass cut!
CJ : George, I see there was a 'R Welsh' baserball cap left in the ice rink over the summer, is it yours?
George: I am surprised that you did not nick it
CJ : Well, I would have but I tried it on and it was far too large
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